Always
by Citrus Fever
Summary: Re-edited with more sex. Bella has regretfully moved on from the Cullen's and now resides in Alaska. Even though she has supposidly let them go, one of the Cullen's just couldn't bare to lose her again. F/F Bellice. AU/slight OOC.


_Always_

Re-edited to include more of a sex scene. This story is now a very heavy M.

I don't own the characters, the books, or anything, so please don't sue. However, against the better wishes of SM, Alice frequently sneaks into my room and does naughty things to me.

**Bella**

The sound of the phone ringing pierced through the gloomy silence that had settled over my small apartment. Heaving an annoyed sigh, I threw down my beat up, torn version of _Wuthering Heights_ and made my way to the kitchen where the obnoxious device was located. I wasn't sure who could possibly be calling me, especially when it was eleven o'clock at night on a Monday.

Angela, or any one of my old friends from Forks, didn't talk to me much anymore now that they were off to bigger, better things like college and marriage. Edward (or any of the Cullen's for that matter) wouldn't dare call me after I broke up with him. Even if it was over a year ago, I had made sure I wouldn't hear from them again. It was too painful. Plus, they didn't have my new number anyways. It couldn't be Charlie because first off, he was out fishing with Billy and Jacob and secondly, he rarely ever calls past nine.

So, who else could it be?

"Hello?" I asked cautiously while grabbing some juice from the fridge and pouring it into a glass.

Silence. Nothing. I was about to curse and hang up when a soft, broken voice made me rethink that decision. "Bella?"

My heart almost stopped beating; in fact, I think it did for a split second. I knew that angelic voice anywhere. That voice had haunted my dreams both day and night for so long. That voice had soothed me as much as it unnerved me. That wonderful voice replayed over and over in my mind as I would touch myself in the most intimate ways, always coming so hard that I had to press a pillow over my face to muffle the screams of both pleasure and anguish.

And the beautiful, witty, sexy pixie that voice belonged to was the sole reason for anything and everything that circled around who I am today. Letting go of Edward, going off to college in Alaska, proudly accepting who I am and all of the imperfections that I came with. I had her to think for that.

"Hello? Bella? Are you there?"

_God, that voice …_

"Yeah, Alice, I'm here. Um, how did you get my number?" I had moved to this place in hopes of finally moving on with my life. It was too much to watch the woman I loved with someone else. With Jasper. I had distanced myself from Edward and I had been causing too much trouble for the Cullen's, so instead of them leaving me once more, I was the one that left without so much as a goodbye. I hated goodbyes.

All I left them was a note.

"I'm a psychic vampire, silly. How do you think I got it?" If anyone was listening to her, they'd think she was perfectly composed. But I heard the tremble in her words; I heard the nervousness, the fear.

I blushed at my stupidity. "Of course, what could a psychic vampire _not _do?" I asked sarcastically.

An uneasy silence came from the other line. I could almost feel how tense she was from … wherever she was.

"Bella, I've needed to know for so long. Why did you leave?"

Her voice was heartbreaking and for a moment I was glad I couldn't see the pain on her face. I couldn't bear to see her hurt, much less hear it over the phone. Guilt and other dark emotions gripped and squeezed the air out of my lungs. For the first time in a while, I regretted leaving.

_The pain, Bella. Knowing she could never be yours no matter how badly you wanted her. Don't be weak._

Taking my own advice, I told her what I felt comfortable saying. "I had to start being my own person,Alice. I couldn't do that with Edward treating me like a child," I said bitterly. It may have not been the _actual_ reason, but it was partly in truth.

She growled, but something told me it wasn't directed at me. "I told him. I told that idiot to start taking you seriously! And you … you should have stayed, despite how he was treating you. Bella, you don't know how many nights I spent trying to hold myself together after you left," she whispered that last part. I'm sure if she could cry, she would be. What I couldn't understand is why it would hurt her so much – me leaving. What was I to her except a living, breathing Barbie doll and a reluctant shopping buddy? I let her have her way while I wallowed in my cowardice, wanting so much more than what I was allowed to have.

What I needed to be was the other half of her soul. Her shoulder to cry on. Her only spot of lightness in the dark. She was all of that to me so why couldn't I be that for her?

_Because Jasper beat you to the punch way before you were even born._

"I'm sorry," I told her, surprising myself by how indifferent and heartless I sounded. It was better than letting her know what damage she was wreaking on my heart.

"If you were truly sorry, you wouldn't have left in the first place. You said to us in that note that you were leaving and you basically told us to back off, but Bella, you never gave us a valid reason! And after more than a year of you being gone, I can't take it anymore! I promised myself that I would respect you wishes, but I cannot exist without you in my life. Bella, please. I need to know. Why did you really leave?"

"I had no reason to stay, Alice," I replied exasperatingly. "Me and Edward were no longer together and I didn't want to be extra baggage. And besides, I couldn't stand to …" I trailed off, catching myself. I wouldn't tell her. I couldn't tell her that I was still in love with her after all this time.

"Couldn't what?" she asked innocently, making me almost lose my reserve.

_You promised yourself! You told yourself that you wouldn't fucking tell her!_

_What do I possibly have to lose that I haven't already thrown away?_

"You want to know so badly, Alice? Be careful what you wish for because once you hear it, it can't be taken back."

"That's what I'm hoping for," she said cryptically.

Well then, here goes nothing. "I just, um, I can't," I couldn't believe that throughout this whole conversation of me speaking eloquently, my tongue chooses now to become twisted. I took a deep breath. I had to get this out so I could put both of us out of our misery. "Honestly, Alice, I just couldn't stand to wait around watching as the person I truly loved … love someone else."

There. It was out in the open now. My only response for a few long seconds was the deafening quiet.

"What do you mean?" she asked me, surprise in her voice. But, there was something else. Hope?

"Let's just say Edward was and forever will be the first and last man I will ever be with."

"So you think you'll never love again?"

"No," I nearly laughed. "I said the only _man, _Alice …"

"Oh." I waited for her to catch on. It didn't take long. "Oh! Oh … so there's someone else then? A girl?"

"Yeah," I breathed, feeling utterly defeated. "Always has been."

My heart started pounding frantically, trying to find a way out of its confined prison within my chest. This was seriously happening. What I promised myself would never happen; it was happening.

I was about to confess something to Alice that I've been holding in for so long. So goddamn fucking long.

"Who? Bella, please, you're killing me!"

I know she knew. How could she not know? She was waiting for me to say it.

And say it I shall.

"You, Alice! Who the fuck else would it be?" I practically yelled. A huge weight lifted off my shoulders as the shameful words escaped and I felt like I could breathe again. I sucked in some air and smiled to myself. I wouldn't have had the courage a year ago to profess my undying love this woman, and even if I was doing it over the phone, I still did it. The most hurtful thing she could do now was reject me, and in her case, it was something I had grown used to. Every time I saw her with Jasper, she was unknowingly rejecting me. This really is no different. It would take me a few weeks to recover, but I would eventually like I did before.

Or at least, I'd recover enough to let myself believe I was fine.

But without Alice, I knew I'd never really be okay.

There was that silence again. Screaming at me. Forcefully telling me that it was all one sided, that she's glad I left if that was my reason.

I felt my eyes stinging. I was about to hang up when she stopped me.

By hand.

My glass of juice fell and shattered onto the floor.

There stood Alice, my beautiful Alice with her silver cell phone still clasped tightly to her right ear. Her hand was on mine, guiding me to hang up the phone as she hung up hers. I couldn't move. It was like my body was paralyzed. Her ocher eyes never left mine, burning holes into my brown orbs. Brilliant gold fire staring at me like I was the only thing in her world.

She was looking at me like I always dreamt she would have. Full of affection, longing, and …

Love. I saw _love_.

"How did you …" I didn't even bother finishing my question on how she got here. My heart knew the answer.

"I saw this," she answered quietly, her gaze never wavering. "I saw _us_. Right here. I got so excited that I didn't think about anything except getting my ass over here to see you," she told me as she backed me up into the counter, paying no mind to the shattered glass and juice on the wooden floor beneath our feet. Thank God I was wearing shoes.

Her eyes were liquid pools of raging emotions. Livid to a point where I could almost feel her seeping through my bones.

I was lost. I was confused. Everything was happening too quickly for me to comprehend what had just happened. All I knew was that she was here with me, and she looked as beautiful as ever.

Her soft, cold hands were lightly brushing over mine. Her leg was comfortably nudged between my own. All I could hear, see, breathe was her.

"I … I don't know what to say," I whispered honestly. "I'm not sure what's going on."

"Neither was I, at first. But when I realized in time that something _was_ going on between us, and I was a fool when I pushed it away. But, Bella, I couldn't hurt Jasper."

Upon hearing that, reality crashed down around me. "Then why are you here?" I asked angrily.

"Because I had to see you. It took us being separated … twice … in order for it to finally enter into my thick skull that I can't live without you, Bella. I need you. I'm nothing without you," she rested her forehead on mine. For minutes we stood there gazing into each other's eyes, taking in the moment. My hands slid through her silky hair and down to her neck, committing this moment to memory. I wasn't about to pass up any opportunity to touch her while I had the chance.

On their own accord, my curious fingers lightly danced across her tensing shoulders and down her rigid back. I didn't want to stop. Her gentle stare turned into something more devious at my actions.

Lord have mercy, what was this pixie doing to me?

"You don't know how many times I've thought about you," she whispered in my ear, taking the sensitive lobe between her teeth. "How many times I've touched myself thinking about you, just remembering how you smell, how soft and warm you are. Ever since I had that vision of you, before I even met you, all those times I was with Jasper I was thinking about you." Her voice lightened from the husky tone it had taken and I felt her smile against my neck. "I've longed to hear your laugh for so long, Bella, I've missed your smile so much and I want nothing more than to be the one who makes you happy." She pulled away slightly so she could look into my watery eyes once more. "I Love you. So much. I was stupid not to tell you sooner."

I small tear ran down my cheek from the corner of my eye before Alice brushed it away with the cold pad of her thumb. "You've always made me happy, Alice. Even when you forced me into shopping and playing dress up with you, I was more than content to just be around you," I laughed through my tears.

"I'm terribly glad I decided to come see you. We've all missed you so much. Even Rosalie misses you," she smiled, and it brightened up the room, and my life. Was this all really happening?

"I know, and I'm sorry for just cutting all of you off like that." This time my apology was sincere.

Alice edged her way closer to me again, which I didn't think was possible. Her leg was sandwiched between mine already and our noses were almost brushing against each other's. Her lips were just millimeters away when she whispered, "Bella, make me yours. I can't wait anymore."

A hazy lust started to fill my senses. Alice had just whispered to me what I've only ever dreamt of her saying before. _I'm _the one that was making her feel this way. Not Jasper. Not anyone else. Me. Modesty had left me and was replaced by lust-induced courage, a courage I've never known before.

"Am I making you wet, Alice?"

She whimpered. I took that as a yes.

"How wet do I make you Alice?"

She gracefully unbuttoned her jeans and guided my hand inside of them. My fingers felt around her soaked underwear, their own heaven, and I smirked, leaning closer into her breathing space. "Damn, you are wet," I said huskily, pushing aside her skimpy panties and touching her soft folds. Alice gasped and touched her forehead against mine again.

"Bella, please … I want you to lick me, fuck me, anything. God, I need you so fucking bad."

"Let me kiss you first, Al. I don't want to fuck you before I kiss you."

Alice nodded and cupped my cheeks in her cool, tiny hands, pulling me to her lips ever so slowly. Her lips were plush and soft as they formed themselves around mine, moving with mine perfectly as I stroked her soaked womanhood. All of the lust and pleasure I was feeling along with being out of breath was making me dizzy and, ironically, the woman that was doing this to me was the same one – the only one – that could keep me standing on my own two feet.

Okay, I had kissed her. Now I could taste her, feel her. Make love to her.

I turned us around so that she was the one pressed against the counter and cleared a space for her, using my arm to sweep everything out of the way. A few things clattered onto the floor, but I didn't care. Alice moaned against my lips, her tongue licking and nipping my lower one. I opened my mouth to her without question, without hesitation. My hands snuck their way under her thighs as I lifted her onto the counter. She was already pushing her jeans down her milky, toned legs when I grabbed the very bottoms and clumsily tugged them off of her before throwing them somewhere off into the kitchen. I broke off our heated kisses to look down at her, running my fingers slowly and tenderly up and down her legs, which were wrapped around my waist.

Her pink thong was completely soaked. I looped my fingers under the waistband and slowly, tortuously pulled them down, kissing any soft, cold skin I could.

"Bella," Alice whispered. I smiled and tossed her panties aside. She pulled me back up to her and kissed me excitedly, passionately, but I'm sure for her it was gentle. She much stronger than I and we both knew that.

My hands started to unbutton her blouse, revealing nothing underneath but her skin. "Oh my God, Alice." I've always known she was beautiful, but never had my human imagination conjured up _this_. She was … magnificent. Her breasts weren't big, they were rather small with dark pink, perky nipples to top them off, but they were perfect for me. I lifted my hands to cup them, and sure enough, they fit perfectly into my palms.

"What?" she asked, her voice breathy. "Is there something wrong?"

I looked up at her incredulously. "Of course not, angel. You're perfect," I whispered to her, afraid if I spoke any louder, I'd break the tender mood that had settled over us.

She placed her hands over mine where they still lay on her breasts and squeezed, eliciting a moan from both of us. I was sure I had died and gone to heaven, or maybe someplace much, much better. This couldn't be happening. Only an hour ago, I was considering this as an impossibility. And now? Now it was happening.

I was too far-gone to realize we were about to have sex in my small kitchen. I think she was too because she wasn't making any move to stop what was unfolding.

"I love you," I whispered as my lips made their way down her milky body. My hands settled on stroking her ribs while my mouth latched on to her cold nipple. Her quiet gasps and moans encouraged me as I rolled my tongue all around it before nipping it, never mind being gentle. She was a vampire after all.

Her fingers had woven themselves in my hair and she pushed down slightly, directing me to where she really wanted me.

"Please, Bella," she moaned as she rested her head on the wall behind her. I wasted no more time. We'll have plenty of it to explore each other. Right now was all about making our long-suppressed dreams a reality.

Before my questing lips could even reach the sanctuary between her legs, I smelt her desire. It was tangy, sensuous, and the more I let it flood my senses, the more I wanted to taste it. There was just something about the noises she was making, the soft gasps and whimpers and pleas that led me to believe she didn't want to wait any more than I did.

My tongue met her wet folds through the thin barrier of her panties and I immediately sought the swollen bundle of nerves that lay nestled between them. I used the fabric to my advantage, letting the hotness of my mouth and the texture of the cotton thong she was wearing add to the sensation. A strangled moan filled the exotic-smelling air as Alice banged the back of her head against the wall. Cold fingers held my hair tighter and pushed me deeper into her snatch. Her hips rolled and I watched in awe as the muscles in her abdomen twitched and flexed, straining against her smooth skin. She really was a sight to behold.

I would have told her so, but my mouth was otherwise engaged.

The taste of her, even through her panties, was unique and there weren't any words to describe it. She tasted like pineapple dipped in sugar and something else – something spicy. I could only imagine what flavor would await me once her panties were out of the equation. Excitement brimmed even further and before my patience could control my actions, I had finger hooked around the skimpy fabric covering her pussy. Slowly, I drug it down her leanly sculpted legs.

They joined her jeans on my kitchen floor, and my face was then buried in Alice's wetness. She sputtered and cursed at the sudden contact and her hips grounded into my mouth more frantically. Her hot fluids spilled into my eager mouth and dripped down my chin. My enthusiastic tongue plundered and curved upwards inside her tight opening as my nose massaged her clit. My name fell repeatedly from my new lover's lips, becoming a mantra as she drowned in the pleasure I was giving her.

Her orgasm came out of nowhere and took us both by surprise. Alice's hips bucked into my face in a quick, staccato rhythm; her moans and whimpers were in perfect synchronization to her jerky movements as we moved to the beat of my heat and our passion.

Then she went completely still and my name was screamed into the heated night.

I licked her twitching sex until she mumbled for me to stop. Her fingers released their fierce hold of my hair and gently moved my bangs from my eyes. Lust-laden eyes peered down at me and beckoned me to come kiss the plush lips that were quirked in a goofy grin.

How could I say no to _that_?

I stood up from my kneeling position, my knees thanking me, and once again melded our bodies together. Small hands cupped my jaw and brought me closer, her pink tongue proceeded to lick every inch of my face that was covered in her essence. Cold and wet, but incredibly smooth, this gesture made me feel appreciated and tranquil. In a way, it felt like she was thanking me.

_Oh but baby, the pleasure was mine._

"You were incredible," I whispered with shaky words. The sight of her coming undone had left me feeling like there wasn't enough air in the room.

She smiled and kissed me sweetly, taking her time exploring the cavern of my mouth. "Take me to bed, Bella. Let me love you."

Even though I had just licked her until she screamed, the way she said that just sounded so innocent.

I slung her arms over my shoulders and, taking the hint, she wrapped them around my neck. I wasn't sure where I got the strength to do this, but right now, none of that mattered. My mind was still on overdrive, excited with all of the possible things she was planning on doing to me.

Alice's legs wrapped around my waist as I carried her to my bedroom, our eyes locked on each other the whole time. As soon as my thighs hit the edge of my bed, I gently put Alice down before tugging my shirt over my head. The way she scooted up the bed was incredibly erotic, even more so was how she motioned with a finger for me to follow. Crawling on all fours towards her, I kissed every inch of skin I could reach before claiming her lips. I slowly divested her of her open shirt and bra before removing the remaining clothes I had on. Alice watched me the whole time, her eyes glassy, a cloud of lust and love filling them to their very depths. Never before have I ever felt so sexy, so _beautiful_ as I did then.

Cupping her cheek, I whispered, "God, the things you do to me."

"Let me feel what I do to you. Let me show you how much you mean to me."

I needed no further words as I let her push me onto the mattress, her nails scratched down my taunt belly to my shaved mound.

**Alice**

"You smell absolutely delectable," I sighed. Bella's warm blood was thundering through her veins as I laid my body over hers, filling the whole room with the scent of her life. I offered a small grin as my hand continued its journey towards her aching center, parting her hot folds so my willing fingers could touch what I've been denying myself for years.

She was so wet that I couldn't tell if I was inside of her or not. Knowing that I did this too her made my chest swell with love and pride. Tonight I would make up for lost time. Starting now there will be no more heartbreak, no more waiting, no more longing for the unreachable.

My fingers felt their way around her wet sex. From the soft folds to her clit to her slit, I felt everything, memorized everything. This moment would forever be burned into my memory.

Our moans filled the air that night, rang like a symphony in my ears. I couldn't have imagined anything more perfect. And after hours upon hours of making love, she finally fell asleep in my arms.

When she woke up the next morning, the Alaskan sun was shining through the window. Looking around, I saw clothes scattered all around the room. My shirt hung on the floor lamp by the bed, Bella's jeans slung over the computer, her shirt on the ceiling fan. This made me laugh and startled my human awake. Those beautiful brown eyes blinked open and crinkled at the ends as she smiled up at me.

"Good morning. What time is it?"

"Time to get your sexy ass up, I'll make you some breakfast."

We smiled at each other flirtatiously as we threw on some clothes and made our way into the kitchen hand in hand. She started cleaning up the spilled juice and glass from last night as I went about finding something to make her.

After I had cooked and made her some coffee, she ate silently with me gazing at her the whole time. I know she hated when we did this, but watching her be so … human was fascinating.

"So how's college?" I asked.

"It's challenging, but exciting. I've made a few friends and the professors are really good."

For another minute, we sat in comfortable silence. I could tell the smirk on my face unnerved her, though.

"I saw the flag in your living room," I admitted with a certain teasing tone.

"Which one?"

"The only one in there, silly! The big rainbow flag. You know Bella, you sure have changed since the last time I saw you. You used to be so shy … and straight."

We both laughed. "Well, I'm still shy, but the other thing? Not so much."

We went silent again, but a mutual question hung in the air.

"Alice?"

"Yes?"

"You have to go back, don't you? To Forks?"

I sighed before smiling softly, hoping to alleviate her fears. "I'm here as long as you want me here, Bella. I'm not being separated form you for a third time."

"But what about Emmett and Rose and Carlisle and Esme and –"

"Bella," I placed a comforting hand over her warm one, "they're coming back here in a few months. We can only stay in one place so long, you know. And if you'd like, I'd be more than happy to stay here with you until they get here and when they do, we'll all be reunited and happy and whole again. And once you finish up your last semester of college, I could … I could change you, if you want …"

"You had this all planed out, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I said a little shyly. "Is that weird?"

"Not in the least," she replied. "Stay."

I love it when a plan comes together. Leaning over the table, I left a soft, lingering kiss on Bella's lips. "Always."

**The End**

_Reviews are love._


End file.
